I have avoided this website along with many other things
(like my waistline for one)
I have lost my usual routines
(like we all have) and although I haven’t used this isolated time in spiritually (as I’ve planned)
I’ve observed my growth and inabilites from the chaos around us
I’ve stayed away from arguments and opinions not out of fear, but out of respect for those who are going to believe what they will believe
(a leash can’t be kept on the free mind)
I’ve avoided the nets trying to ring me into their herd
(It’s okay to be the shepherd alone in the field yet still care for the flock)
I’ve felt the anger, pain, and disgust in man and the beauty always present in nature mirroring the situations we made:
We were snowed under, threatened by fire, we tumbled and shook unearthed, and flooded by the rain (reign)?
Can we still be part of the sister/brotherhood if I don’t follow the same crew or invisible need to rule?
This is the beginning of me
(separating from concrete views) to discern for myself what deems right for all; not just my plights, concerns or personal views.
-ES
Cue the music to vibe with my poem:
Christmas Star (A New Age)
I’ve spoken in the past about a lucid dream of seeing an aurora borealis (dreaming propositions blog 2018) in the sky with angels peering out which resulted in freaking out people out- like aliens visiting the planet would. I knew it would come true but dreams are symbolic (at least mine are) so I could deduct by Christmas we would encounter something. Why Christmas? Well the angels were dressed like carolers (spirit knows how I think). I bring this up because it doesn’t have to be a huge phenomena in the sky but someting we feel. I think we will have some people that would find what they saw/understand as scary and others divine- haa sounds like the upcoming inaugration. Now we just had a Christmas Star… so what you may think! I think it’s a marker (my dreams are vast in timeframes but they allow for peeking from 3 days to years) so I’m alert were gonna be shocked and it could take years to manifest (like this did) but whatever transpires (or not) its divine’s will. Like I keep preaching if you care about the holy sacredness of life and love TRUE LOVE not selective/romantic/relationships but I’m talking empathy of the collective you’ll not panic with the sheep so easily as you’ll feel your way into neutrality or action to help the sheep. I hope were shocked by positive influences that begin a movement that empowers the heart and planet.
Of course it’s a new year and we’ve been hearing the usual chorus of “new beginnings” but this one feels different and sincere (maybe it’s just me). After time in captivity (well were not quite done yet) we’ve witnessed our urges and hopefully we discovered we are really blessed in spite of not having social engagements but cuddled and connected to family. We may have found ourselves in scary improverishment of relationships or employment -I pray you’ll find miracles reaching for you while you desperately balance your mind, body and soul in the dark nights of the soul-they are truly gut wrenching. Soon you’ll see the dawn of a new journey YOU ARE NEVER ALONE- I promise you! Start by being an eager student ask for help your graded on how you enrich the world around you so if you’re too proud ask for help THEN HELP SOMEONE in need to get you off the floor and into the heart’s healing womb of LOVE Don’t be stingy with your abilities even if you feel numb…you’ll eventually thaw in it’s warmth.
About that new beginning…
Last night I looked at the movies available and said “Yes that!” I’m not saying I was psychic on choosing it, more like led and pulled (we all have these signs available but it takes practice to follow thru with hunches). When it came to this scene and the once famous leading actress spoke on how she’d wished she be in the same spot as the girl who has been denied her dreams with obstacles using only her passion for theatre to continue (quickly fading) did I sit straight up knowing full well this arrow was shot at me …the late bloomer! It’s never too late and who says you can’t have many passions and successes.
Sit up, Stand up, Show up!
Wherever you may see yourself perhaps in the end stages getting ready to build anew, or the middle of making life work a little easier just know the beginning of what you’re here for is just waiting on your passion.

Ps. Thank you for those who commented in the previous posts (I just now learned I have comments yay). I’m so honored to have people leave me messages I really thought it was only my mother reading this lol and so I wanted to say THANK YOU. I nearly considered taking this website down and just using my Penzu to keep my journals.
You always touch my heart, especially through your self-reflective thoughts and feelings expressed in your writings. Thanks for sharing yourself with us.
I so very much appreicate your love and support since the very beginning of my life! xoxo