I can kiss myself from the inside
and bloom my heart from within
the petals fall from my opened eyes & full smile
I can clearly see you
Do you know what I mean?
Have you felt yourself melt?
I speak not of holding one’s hand
or twisting in the sheets
I’m not talking about winking at possibilities in the street
or dreaming while awake
it’s not envisioning, nor delusions
It’s just me in Love united in my soul
it’s just the universe and me in bliss; in my own kiss!
-Erica Sussette
What a beautiful day albeit cold today! I must give the credit to the great teachings of Wayne Dyer who came across my youtube screen before I turned it off to go to bed with the title “Do this 5min before you fall asleep!” I think what’s even more fascinating is that the next segment that came on was his lesson on “Obscurity” really !!!! My blog title from just this week (hello Universe) I’m listening. Well, I welcomed his perspective on humbly living and I’ve seen it’s helped me tremendously in life especially when people have a need to “teach you a lesson,” and you know it’s bullshit, you might even know better than them, maybe even see a solution, even miscommunication, but you also know it’s a waste of your energy to try and educate or defend yourself in some cases (they’ve shut you out) so you let it go, let them believe what they’ve created; bow out and take leave. It’s enough I promise you, it really is.
How do you get there? You love yourself and that journey is when you really learn how amazing it is to be free. His lesson on Living in Obscurity is a fast pass to humility but in order to start, you’re going to have to want peace . . . for everyone. Some of us have lessons to “speak up for ourselves and ask for what you need” this was my failing grade for years and I’m getting better although it’s not a for sure thing as you will encounter people not willing to hear or even understand what it is your asking for (I’m guilty of confounding simple requests trying to come across in peace, but sounding demanding- gotta just say it simple & have faith).
I bring this up because I learned of someone breaking up with their lover as I listened I was very grateful for my day and the solitude I have ain’t so bad. I’ll wait for someone who’ll care long enough to see and hear me. Funny that I also get tagged on this amazing love letter a man wrote to his beloved so precise to what all women long for written on elephant journal https://www.elephantjournal.com/2013/08/when-i-say-i-love-you-this-is-what-i-mean/
Today I had fun with a Barista. When I placed my order she really listened when I said “I wish I could have the affogato but the ice cream would kill my stomach” and she then asked me if I wanted almond milk when I had forgotten to request it. Great service yes, but I saw a great person! I said, “oh my goodness Thank You, you’re like my fairy Godmother, saving me from not making it to the ball!” We laughed and she said “Coffee godmother” and I laughed “Yes my coffee-conscious!” We wished each other good day and you know what; it felt like a good day! I went across the street to grab mangos a friend’s favorite I was to visit. I stood in line between two women and as we waited for the slow checkout I noticed the lady behind me had sugar on the counter “Oh, I keep on forgetting to grab that!” I didn’t expect a reply but she said, “it’s just right there you have time.” I looked to lady on my right next to be checked out with my face showing my doubts and she remarked, “you go get it!” I did and when I returned I said thank you to the one who had it on the counter and told the same to the lady now checking out “you know I was hesitant cause it helps me not to bake but this weather is perfect for baking.” The woman behind me told me what she was going to use it for and the other woman said, “what are you ladies talking about?” When she said that I was so touched because again in just moments we felt comfortable and safe to just have fun and we shared a little more and again it was “have a nice day” and we all really meant it. SIMPLE
As I drove to my friend’s house I went over these encounters with people who made me smile and my heart exploded like it does when I let go and just live in harmony and I let it burn brightly and to think just yesterday I was pining over the long wait of not having a partner. It hit me! There’s no lover in my life now yet I feel passionate, grateful and loving. There’s no sense of loss when I burst my heart, I enjoy life my friends are amazing and life can be seen just as generous as it can be lacking; depending on my views and if I’m pursuing change.
I may not have demonstrated “obscurity” as Wayne taught aka “see me,” but I saw others and I am so grateful for that. Oh, that’s right!!!!! I forgot as I left my street a man who looked shaken by life or mentally challenged stood on the corner waiting for me to take the turn as my vehicle was clearly blocking his crossing. I smiled and gave him a wave to assure him to go ahead and cross. This man didn’t trust me and stood a bit but I held my smile and attention on him, and kept waving towards him I then remembered Wayne’s message last night when he spoke of Mother Teresa “saying she saw every day Jesus in all his distressing disguises.” To my heart’s content, he saw “in” me and OMG he smiled at me in full joy I swear on my heart he did! This almost toothless weary tired man waved happily, and smiled at me for a moment like he knew me or remembered me like a friend and then he regained composure when his realization hit and cautiously walked in front of me while I sent my heart chakra to him and prayed he keep that heart open (me too) because he had a boyish sweetest charm at that moment that melted me. Love brings you to your knees!
So, if you haven’t felt your heart burst and radiate then I would say stop playing the game of life and BE LIFE.
Blessings in Love
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