We’ve been stuck in a small space all week from Christmas to New Year’s Eve.

I had to ask for “quiet” multiple times when they slammed my sister’s doors.

I had to remind them to keep things tidy and don’t let the dogs find your candy.

I had to ask for help more than they offered but there are things I noticed I did not have to preach.

They stood up and stuck out their hand and greeted guests warmly directly eye to eye.

They offered hugs and kisses to their aunties and sat attentively with my Mom and Dad.

They chose board games with family over video games and chats (how about that). 

They made me laugh out loud at the airport several times with their memes, people looked over at me wondering if I was smoking something!

What can I say but I enjoyed my children every day.

As I sat and watched the ‘The Family Stone’ Christmas on the plane ride home, I couldn’t help but cry that my boys will soon be grown. I looked over at my beautiful children and the tears streaming down I didn’t want to hand them over to their Dad when we touched the ground.

I wasn’t unhappy I was flooded with a parents wish “my kids are my most precious gift.”  They don’t need badges of honor or accolades on the wall. They are my sunshine and rainbows and my true peace and reward. However, can it be; that this is the destiny that God blessed me? I was once a girl who got into fights and liked the city lights, but now it seems so unlikely of me..this is what I was born to be.

In Gratitude for all the years that my children have given to me and 2019 will be a turning point when the eldest goes off to College a new era of motherhood begins with a new mystery of what is to be without one baby under my wing.

GOD HELP ME.